a million reflected versions of

who i am has completely dissipated from what i was.
 who i am is never who i have been,
in this instance,.. loss of memory has never been so raveshing.
I am in constant motion
in constant, oscillating route.
embodying, ingesting, expelling the form of an Providence-Birthed idea. rather than simply stating one.
and never the intention to dispel with words or rape it of it's timely prophetic revelation by implicating it as my own..
I feel the weight of a holy revelation that is meant to carry multiple hooks...explicit instances.. emotive noiseless sirens to reach the hungry heart, internal dialogue, and eyes of the masses.

I have learned the craft, ..the lifestyle of becoming nameless and faceless in distinction, but whose truth of intentions reverberate mightily off the memory.

To not exist, to fully embody who i was meant to be (even in that moment) in ever turning mazes- that all lead to One ending point.
one Eternal focus.

a million facets, a million versions of who I was/am (to become). (to become). (to become). (to become).
to Be come in one lifetime.

the human element is always the strongest, and most poetic.

..there are approximately 7 +27 zeros - atoms in the human body,
and there are 10 + 21 zeros- stars in the Universe.

...so there are more atoms in the average human body than stars in the Universe.

i'm not.

i've been spending my nights in a way where the two lines between this night turning into the next blur.

living in a state where time is limitless, where the rules of the body have no reign on the thought-life.

where prayer & meditation can never be extinguished.

where i am no longer a physical facet

but now an idea. a motion-filled truth (or adherence of).

where i am not looking to leave traces, 

but let truth leave its distinguishable emblems on me.

where 12% is conversation.

and 88% is the miracles happening inter-cellularly therein.

what beautiful, ravenous, rapture to never ..be.. 

in control.

the importance of me has diminished. it

was never a fight against myself, 

but more of a translucent,

diminishing surrender.

as more of the figment of what i wanted to become floated upwards,

 and the condensed, saturated, heavy dew of truth began to fall from the

extraterrestrial origin.

..can you sense the soul of a man .. simply by the manifestation and work of his hands?
i find.... i am realizing the symbolic meanings of people are more evident, much weightier, and increasingly vivid than any aggressive acknowledgement of their identity or assertive effort of their own declarations...
what they profess to be can change with the turning tide and sometimes you can sense the deceit in their tongue.
what they produce with their hands, can give themselves away.
but who they were born to become, stays anchored to their feet. rising like a swell of emotion in their sleep, cultivating the child dreamer in their stagnant day-to-day, sometimes haunting them, ..causing them to unhinge, disclose, and depart with anything and everything that silently protests to them to dilute and sway.
most people, not all..
"those born of the Spirit are like the wind. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell whether it's coming or going".-jn 3:8.


"whatever he shall place his hands on, shall prosper..
"he saw that the Lord was with him and that the Lord caused all that he did to succeed.- gen. 39:3


"he is like a tree planted by streams of Living Water, ...which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither.".-ps 1:3

I need..revelation to crack the sky in my dreams tonight.
there is nothing in the atmosphere that can slowly dilute the avocation, liveliness that is happening in the atmosphere tonight.
it is both a strange and unnerving thought.
leave it to me, ..to live and ask for the most dangerous, unorthodox way of life.
as i was sitting merely in a waiting area today..i realized for the first time upon my  awakening understanding- that no one can fully partake in the same thought that would simply lay out consecutively in their mind; where in mine: it is a never-ending maze of integrated labyrinths, begging to be solved. while at the same time plummeting to the deep abyss of the ocean floor, only to find revelation therein.

it hit me for the first time.. that my imagination could really be the death of me. it causes me to salivate both spiritually and shake with hunger physically.
i find the mind, .. imagination.. desire.. can soak up so much of my energy to cause me to revive my focus.
how, ... how, i long to let it excavate.. elevate  these inward, too often ignored Spiritual revelations to the symbolic of the physical.
i feel it is incessantly reaching for something grandiose.. something deeper. than me. my eyes are n(ever)ot satisfied.

it is happening... it is slowly happening.. maybe that is reason for the frenetic friction; the atmosphere that agitates under the seemingly calm of my external skin.

i am. forming again.
i am morphing into another elevated facet. of what He always dreamed of me. to Be.

we.

i hope everything i've built shatters to pieces.
I hope all the monuments i've made burn to the ground..
i hope it is a  vibrant death.
you see..many people do not like the idea of holding onto the wind.
they do not like the idea of being in constant motion.. limitless.
they do not like the idea of seeing their heaping towers,.. swaying in the wind.
i hope i get to watch my monuments fall to the ground.

i hope those monuments will never carry my name.  in all actuality, i know they're raised only for the point of being burned..
only for the point of carrying on top of it a poignant moment -between the viewer and the introduction.

because within that actuality is the revelatory Sanctity. encapsulated and coming forth as an idea. but within that idea, is the need for the Eternal. the means of the eternal. the Hunger for the Eternal.

...The eternal One's fingerprints reach forth in saturation of the instigation of your eyes, only to make itself known across the hidden, internal, unknown make of your spiritual body. like the incubation of never-once-opened cells. being massaged, budding, and waking to life.

to purify the eyes,
to provoke the spirit to erupt in flailing  motion,
to raise your semblance, ..reach high,.. and begin to call forth from the Eternal.

to raise your eyes, ...lift your chests .. and finally gaze long enough, deep enough, penetrated
.. to look past the physical symbol.
the Eyes of the Eternal One burns cosmoses in your eyes in the very wake of your meeting.

in the lord of the flies.

 i can sense their buzzing, forming around my head, 

..but this time it's occuring only from a distance.

this time, 

i feel safe.

despite their intentional, broken-arrows, pointed, placed, and 

threatened at me.

* i have dismantled my 70+  playlist.. to completely overturn & renew.

there will be a new semblance of music to evoke and provoke; heal, and revive

 coming soon.

but here,

[STARE]

Prayer ubiquity.